Today's lesson

I'm constantly learning and growing with this whole motherhood thing. Today I realized Kenny is trying to teach me "early to bed and early to rise." Man, is that a tough one! Sometimes 6 am comes way too early, but nothing is better than little man getting tired by 7 and I get to have quality time with the hubs. Another thing Kenny has taught me is not to forget about that special relationship I have with my husband. When Kenny came along, suddenly priorities shifted and sleep lacked. Ryan and I became grumpy sleep-deprived people, which is not one of our better states to be in. While caring for a colicky baby, things hit a boiling point and we decided to get back to square one. We have spent every day since stabilizing and solidifing our commitment to each other. We got back to the lovey-dovey things and took time out for ourselves away from everything else. Nothing prepares you for parenthood. Every moment is such a journey. So blogging world, I'm back, and I've got some stories to share. :)

Fearless with cape in hand

I'm ready now. Nursery is done. Baby Shower is over (thank you again for all involved). Bags are packed. Classes are taken. Books are read.
I find comfort in the fact that many women less prepared than I am have had babies and survived! I'm anxious to start this new chapter. I'm anxious to be comfortable again. Unfortuantely, I'm not one of those women who just glow with pregnancy. It has been a challenge for me, which makes this baby's arrival even that much more special to me.
With this being my first child, I've heard a lot of advice. However, I'm anxious to learn about Kenny from him and to find out what his personality, wants, and needs are. I really think that if I did anything else to prepare, it would be overkill. Now is my time to relax and rest and wait. Ryan is back in town for awhile and we have increased our walking so I'm more active now than previously in the pregnancy. We're ready. I'm ready. Now we just have to wait for Kenny to be ready!

Oh to sleep, perchance to dream . . .

So, my life has been non-stop getting ready for baby. I'm burnt out. My mind is fried. I'm tired. I can't sleep anymore. I'm too uncomfortable. I can't bend. I'm sure I'll feel a whole lot better once I actually get some sleep, but for right now, I'm just going to complain so I get it all out of my system. One month until my due date. Please, don't be late, Kenny!

In case you haven't heard . . .

Our baby already has a name! Before we found out the sex of our baby, Ryan and I already had names picked out. The fact that the baby turned out to be a boy, made everything really special for us. We wanted a strong name, a family name, and a name with a lot of meaning behind it. So, if you haven't heard me say it already, our little guy will be named

Kenneth Royce Pedersen

Kenneth comes from Ryan's uncle, who died in his early twenties fighting in Vietnam.
Royce comes from my uncle, who passed just last year.

I did not have the honor of knowing "Uncle Kenny", but I've read stories from those who fought with him in the war. He was 23 when he died from wounds sustained in a grenade explosion in Vietnam. He had only been fighting there a couple months. Here are a few words from a fellow soldier of his:

"He was not your average kid, not at all. Pedersen was that rare kind of person that made the world a better place by his just being there; the kind of young man we'd all like to have for a son, or brother, or husband, or best friend. He was tall, blond, clear eyes, a strong face; very Scandinavian-like, but it was more than his good looks that set him apart. He was intelligent and kind, mature, focused, quiet and calm in his manner and he was always looking out for those around him. Pedersen never spoke of it, but one sensed that he had some very deeply felt spiritual conviction. He rarely, if ever, used any of the foul language that was so common with virtually all of us. I doubt he had any natural inclination to be a combat soldier; he was too kind and gentle, but in a very short time he was widely respected as one of the best grunts in Delta company. Pedersen didn't act like a good guy, he was a good guy."

My Uncle Royce had always been a prominent figure in my life. With my grandparents on my dad's side passing away when I was very young, my Uncle Royce always filled that void. He was more like my grandpa than my uncle. He rarely missed a birthday, holiday, or special event that I was involved in. Soon after he was married, he was in a terrible car accident that left him with debilitating injuries that he would struggle with for the rest of his life. In spite of that, he become known for his generosity, humility, and perseverance. He never hesitated to show his love and concern for you. He had a strong testimony of the gospel and the spirit just radiated from him. I miss him so much, but I know that he's now free of pain and watching down on me from above. I can still feel his love, and I know he has watched over me throughout my trials with this pregnancy and I know he's with my little boy's spirit right now, telling him how wonderful of a family he is soon going to be apart of.

I am so thankful that these two great men lived such incredible legacies.

Ryan and I are honored to give our son this name.

Miss me much?

So I had every intention of doing this a long time ago, but life gets in the way and yadda yadda yadda. The short and sweet of it is . . . I'm back! I've decided to restart the blogging adventure. Reason #1: I'm about to have a baby (which is beyond insane and I'm still trying to believe it myself) and, let's be honest, I'm gonna need an outlet for all my bragging and completely ridiculous new mom moments.

Reason #2: I have a centralized pile of weight on my belly region that prevents me from being as active as I would like. I get so frustrated when I can't do everything I want to do because of the huffing and puffing and overheating. Therefore, the more time I can relax with my feet up, the better.

Okay, so in case you haven't heard from me in ages, I'm pregnant! 34 weeks and getting fatter by the day! It's been quite an emotional journey, but one that I feel so blessed to be going through. I've become the stereotypical pregnant woman: moody, cranky, swollen, ice cream craving, anxious, worried, and hot. But then again, I was all those things before! :)

Ryan and I have also moved back to Georgia and are now living in our first house in Sugar Hill, north of Atlanta. It feels so good to be in the South again! The trees are plentiful and the weather is perfect! Did I mention we live just down the road from the lake? I love love LOVE driving across it! I'm anxiously trying to put the house together before the baby comes, but considering we bought a house we could "grow into", I think it's gonna take quite awhile. Tank is still our little guy, and we wouldn't have it any other way. He's been loving running up and down the stairs and sunbathing in our (finally fenced!) yard. I think he's in heaven. :)

Just What I Needed to Read

This is a great article, and I stumbled upon it exactly when I needed to read it.

Emily Thevenin, “Am I of Worth?,” Ensign, Jul 2009, 8–9

I knew where I was going with my education, career, and future family. How could I deal with a chronic illness?
Growing up, I always enjoyed being involved in activities. I played sports, participated in clubs, worked hard in school, and attended seminary and church activities. My participation and success in these activities played a major role in how I viewed myself. As a missionary in Ireland, I continued to evaluate myself according to my efforts and relative success. I was blessed with the strength to work hard and complete my mission. Upon returning home, I went back to school and enveloped myself in activities.
Shortly thereafter I began to feel very ill. After seeing many doctors and undergoing expensive tests and painful surgeries, I learned I had a chronic physical illness. Despite my attempts to go on living a busy and active life, the illness caught up with me.
That was more than five years ago. I now experience constant pain and fatigue, and I have forgotten what it feels like to be healthy. Medications reduce my pain, but they also leave me unable to do much of anything; some days I am not even able to get out of bed. There are times when I feel I have lost a significant part of my identity. How can I be of worth if I can’t even get out of bed?
As a youth I learned about individual worth. Now I’m really being tested as to the source of my worth. Is it based on my accomplishments, or is it based on the truth that I am a child of God? When faced with feelings of inadequacy, I seek guidance through conversing with my Heavenly Father as well as reading and pondering the scriptures.
I have often asked the Lord if I am still important. After much prayer and scripture study I have learned that Heavenly Father’s closeness helps me understand more fully who I really am. I have learned, and continue to learn each day, that my worth does not depend on my abilities but is founded in the fact that I am His child.
I continue to have days when I am discouraged, and I turn to the story of Job to give me comfort and direction. Despite unimaginable difficulties and being judged and misunderstood by friends, he continued to praise God (see Job 16; 19:14). While overwhelmed with grief, Job proclaimed, “Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him” (Job 13:15).
I find comfort in knowing that Job experienced difficulties despite his faithfulness. The story of Job teaches me that my illness is not a punishment from God, and that serving as a missionary and living right does not entitle me to a life free of pain and difficulty. The health problems I have do not make me less valuable to my Heavenly Father. In life we are often rewarded for our accomplishments, our work, our talents, and our abilities. I now find comfort in knowing that the Lord will bless me for my righteous desires despite my current physical weakness.
I lean on the Lord for support and guidance in my illness all the time. It is inspiring to feel the impressions of the Holy Ghost and know that Heavenly Father is teaching me. Through the gift of the Holy Ghost, He gives me peace, love, and assurance. I know by these specific impressions that I am of worth. Even if some days all I am able to do is lie in bed and pray that the pain lessens, it is comforting to know that He cares.
As a result of my trials, I am learning a powerful truth—I am a child of God. Now, instead of feeling empty and alone, I am filled with His love.

Slumber Party Courtesy of the Cassady's

Two weeks ago, Ryan and I had a sleepover at my Aunt Carol and Uncle Royce's home in Monroe. We had such a good visit! We looked through tons of old pictures and stayed up way too late talking!

I love my Uncle Royce!

Kisses for the sweet!

Thanks for your hospitality, Cassady fam! We love you!